Like you Jeffrey I feel the limitations of yes/no answers-what l would call a dualism. My idea of a duality (that aligns with how Wenger uses the concept) is more flexible I think. Here’s a post I wrote in rhizo14 that expresses my view of it as a mutuality between, say freedom and responsibility https://francesbell.wordpress.com/2014/02/13/you-cant-have-one-without-the-other/. So you see Jeffrey l think duality might be your friend in your rejection of dualism.